I'm a month and a half, maybe two months into my second stint living abroad. Or my second country I should say. I haven't actually lived in the US now for closing on two years. Cambodia is very, very different from Singapore. I would imagine every country is different from each other. Still, you expect some similarities and some differences. Your expectations are invariably wrong.
I bitched and moaned extensively about Singapore. Most people, at some point, do. And it probably took leaving to truly appreciate it. I will always have a special place in my heart for the little red dot. And yet, what I will miss most, are my friends. I will always have a connection in the United States - something to bring me back - my closest friends, the dirt, my family, of course. What would bring me back to Singapore? What will bring me back to Cambodia?
I ask because my time in Singapore fundamentally changed and shaped me as a person, perhaps as much as any experience in my life. And the bonds I formed with some of the people there - I value them very deeply. Will they last? Will they be enough to bring me back, just for a visit?
My mother still writes to the Norwegian woman who lived with her in Texas. She even took us to visit her in Norway when we were much younger. Clearly, that bond has lasted however infrequent and inconsistent it may be. And communication is so, so very much easier today than it ever was before. My fears, perhaps, are unfounded.
My closest friends in Singapore were all Singaporean, true though some of them may have lived in the United States or elsewhere in Europe. In Cambodia, I'm surrounded by white expats. The closest relationship I have with a local is with my assistant. Culturally, we are so different - I think the bonds that transformed me so much in Singapore will be hard to form here. I am truly other in a way I didn't imagine. An invisible line separates the locals from the foreigners, not that it cannot be broken, but it is much more tangible than it was in Singapore.
They called Singapore Asia-lite because the city is clean; people speak English; you can get all your necessities... the list goes on. And I agree, Singapore is Asia-lite. But I don't think it's all those things that make it "asia-lite"; it's not the clean city, the functional public transportation, or the clearly delineated rules and regulations. All of that is gone in Phnom Penh, but I don't think that's what makes it feel so foreign. It's the inability to reach a cultural, intrinsic, fundamental understanding of one another. I will always, always be viewed as the white, male foreigner first and whoever I am as a person second, in Cambodia. In Singapore, that wasn't always the case - often wasn't the case at all.
Now, everyone yell at me for being an imperialistic asshole who isn't willing to make the effort to assimilate, fully assimilate to the local culture.
I bitched and moaned extensively about Singapore. Most people, at some point, do. And it probably took leaving to truly appreciate it. I will always have a special place in my heart for the little red dot. And yet, what I will miss most, are my friends. I will always have a connection in the United States - something to bring me back - my closest friends, the dirt, my family, of course. What would bring me back to Singapore? What will bring me back to Cambodia?
I ask because my time in Singapore fundamentally changed and shaped me as a person, perhaps as much as any experience in my life. And the bonds I formed with some of the people there - I value them very deeply. Will they last? Will they be enough to bring me back, just for a visit?
My mother still writes to the Norwegian woman who lived with her in Texas. She even took us to visit her in Norway when we were much younger. Clearly, that bond has lasted however infrequent and inconsistent it may be. And communication is so, so very much easier today than it ever was before. My fears, perhaps, are unfounded.
My closest friends in Singapore were all Singaporean, true though some of them may have lived in the United States or elsewhere in Europe. In Cambodia, I'm surrounded by white expats. The closest relationship I have with a local is with my assistant. Culturally, we are so different - I think the bonds that transformed me so much in Singapore will be hard to form here. I am truly other in a way I didn't imagine. An invisible line separates the locals from the foreigners, not that it cannot be broken, but it is much more tangible than it was in Singapore.
They called Singapore Asia-lite because the city is clean; people speak English; you can get all your necessities... the list goes on. And I agree, Singapore is Asia-lite. But I don't think it's all those things that make it "asia-lite"; it's not the clean city, the functional public transportation, or the clearly delineated rules and regulations. All of that is gone in Phnom Penh, but I don't think that's what makes it feel so foreign. It's the inability to reach a cultural, intrinsic, fundamental understanding of one another. I will always, always be viewed as the white, male foreigner first and whoever I am as a person second, in Cambodia. In Singapore, that wasn't always the case - often wasn't the case at all.
Now, everyone yell at me for being an imperialistic asshole who isn't willing to make the effort to assimilate, fully assimilate to the local culture.
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